Being a pop star is a serious job. You can’t just walk through the door and get started. You need to have a proper interview first. This month’s applicant is Pizzagirl. The board will see you now.
Why do you want to be a pop star?
I would LOVE for you to consider me for the role of “pop star” as I think I’d be a great asset to the pop world! I’m hunky in all the wrong places. I will exploit myself for fame and fortune at any cost! I love to party (as long as my drinks are paid for) and I have no job! So when should I start!?
How would your bandmates describe you?
As I don’t have any bandmates, currently I can only speculate as to how my hypothetical bandmates would describe me, and I think they’d say I am really amazing, patient and kind, a bit of a wildcard and weird looking!
What are your best and worst qualities?
A quality I like about Pizzagirl aka ME is that I’d like to think I am quite open-minded when it comes to music. I think always being open to change up your look and music is refreshing to me maybe? I could list a billion bad qualities but to pick one, I’d say that maybe I spend too much time on the internet and it hurts my eyeballs!
What is your biggest failure?
Dying my hair blue, I looked like Buzz Lightyear but not in an attractive or charming way as depicted in the big Toy Story films!
What accomplishment are you most proud of?
I’m quite proud of the fact that a lanky boy called Pizzagirl has managed to fool the internet into thinking my silly songs are worth listening to, that’s expert deception.
Where do you see yourself in five years?
Hopefully playing a thousand shows and making some new friends and putting out as much music as my mushy mind can create!
What is your salary expectation?
As long as I can afford my dropbox and Netflix monthly payments, I should be okay. Maybe a lil extra for food, idk.
Taken from the March issue of Dork, out now.
Featuring Sigrid, Drenge, Sundara Karma, Indoor Pets, Stella Donnelly and more.